Reflections of a Parent in a Learner-Centered Middle School

June 3, 2024 will forever be a significant day for me, and for my family.

I sat in the crowd at a local theater, watching in awe as the graduating eighth grade class of our micro-middle school, including my child, took to the stage to reflect on their time at Embark. That very same day marked the official start of my role as Executive Director of our organization.

From Embark Parent to Part of the Team

As both a parent of a now-graduated Embark learner, and the new Executive Director of Embark, my journey has been uniquely multifaceted. Our learner-centered micro-middle school, the true north that guides our work, has not only shaped the lives of its learners but has also profoundly impacted my perspective on education and parenting. I have had the great privilege  of feeling this impact over the years, first as an Embark parent beginning with the 2021-2022 school year. 

Not long into the admissions and enrollment process, I knew in my heart that this is something that I wanted my child to be a part of, and he felt the same. As his journey at Embark began, that feeling in my heart grew into an innate knowing that there was something very special happening at Embark. So, when Embark was searching for a COO, I jumped at the opportunity to bring my decades of nonprofit experience and leadership to the organization. I officially became a part of the team, joining as COO in spring 2023 before ultimately transitioning to my new role as Executive Director on that significant day, June 3, 2024.

Our Family’s Learner-Centered Journey 

When my child first entered Embark, the transition was surprisingly smooth. Embark’s competency-based approach, emphasizing agency, authentic learning, and holistic development, resonated well with our family values. However, new challenges emerged as we navigated the complex and dynamic journey of adolescence. The initial ease gave way to a landscape that required careful navigation and thoughtful decision-making.

Adolescence is a period marked by rapid changes and evolving needs. During this time, I found myself constantly evaluating when to step in and when to step back. The core value we hold as a family is not doing for our children what they can do for themselves. 

Another core belief we have as a family is in the importance of not getting in the way of a natural consequence, especially when the stakes are low. These principles are central to fostering independence, and resilience.

While as a family we hold these values close, discerning when and how to apply them became especially challenging, particularly with a neurodivergent child navigating adolescence and middle school. 

Intentionally Challenging Instinct

On the flip side, as challenges arose, my instinct as a parent was often to provide support or advocacy - when our children experience pain, it seems natural to want to ensure their well-being and safety. I had to ask myself tough questions: Is this a situation where my child can thrive independently? Do they need my guidance, or is this an opportunity for them to develop their voice and problem-solving skills independently? I had to be honest with myself - was I just seeking relief from my own discomfort? These questions became even more nuanced with a neurodivergent child, where the line between support and independence can be difficult to navigate.

In addition, we live in a society where academic performance and testing continue to be seen as primary indicators of success. Despite my values and desire for a new educational paradigm, my mindset was challenged. It sometimes felt like the “system” was still alive and well in me. In a learner-centered environment, this presents an ongoing challenge. We are constantly values-tested, balancing our belief in a holistic, competency-based, trusting approach to learning against the external pressure to conform to traditional success metrics.

This tension requires us to constantly reassess our values and priorities. It’s a reminder that success is multifaceted and that true learning encompasses much more than what can be measured by tests and grades.

Despite these complexities, I did my best to let my child lead and not inadvertently take away their agency - no doubt I got it wrong at times. In the end, I witnessed a remarkable transformation in my child. What became evident was that my worries were often premature judgments of a process that needed time to unfold. Education is not a linear journey, and the learner-centered approach recognizes and embraces this complexity. My child flourished, becoming more confident, self-directed, adept at navigating relationships, and passionate about their education. And because he was given radical trust, he learned to trust himself; an invaluable lesson!

Stories of Lasting Transformation 

The audacious redefinition and reclamation of middle school success was on full display at this month’s Reflection Sharing Experience. In this culminating end-of-year event, our eighth graders took to the stage at a local theater where they were interviewed by our education team about their time at Embark. What they shared was truly remarkable.

Our Head of School, Brian Hyosaka, asked one graduating eighth grader, Kai, to share who he is now after being at Embark for three years. His response?

“I have a lot more self-management than I did earlier and I think I've really grown there.” 

Brian continued, asking Kai when he goes off to high school, what he will be walking away with. Kai replied:

“I think I'm walking away with more agency and then also reflection. Those two are really helpful for me.”

When Brian asked another eighth grade learner, Julian, what he will be taking with him from his time at Embark, this is what Julian had to say:

“Probably the communication and the agency. Agency of all the sports I play out of school, it's really going to help me. And communicating with my teachers if I miss a day or miss an assignment just to talk to them.” 

When asked the same question, eighth grader Maura shared:

“I think so much of what I've learned about myself has come through reflections that I've done at Embark. I've learned so much about myself and I've grown so much and I've gotten a lot of support from sharing my reflections with my educators. And then also agency because managing your own time is important.”

Another learner, Ruby, reflected:

“I will probably take communication into high school because I've learned a lot about how when you ask for help, it's better. Because especially in sixth and seventh grade, I was learning how to ask for help and for feedback because when problems would happen, I would kind of just be like, ‘I'll figure it out later.’ But that doesn't actually help. So, I think I would benefit a lot from asking for help.”

To see our competencies - the very thing that piqued my interest about Embark years ago - being lived, and I mean really lived, in our learners’ reflections brought me to tears. And not just because my child was on that stage telling stories about his growth in collaboration and his newfound agency to advocate for himself and what he needs. But because when I think about a future where every single learner is trusted to be an active participant in driving their learning, and their life, the possibilities are boundless. And that is a beautiful and powerful force for change not only in education, but for the greater good.

Closing Reflection

As parents, it is natural to want immediate reassurance that our children are on the right track. However, my experience taught me the importance of patience and trust in the learning process at Embark. Learner-centered education is about nurturing the whole child, allowing them to develop at their own pace, and providing them with the tools to become lifelong learners. It is a process that cannot be rushed, forced, or judged prematurely.

Being both an alumni parent and the Executive Director at Embark has given me a unique perspective on the impact of learner-centered education. I have seen firsthand how this approach can transform not only the learners but also the families and communities involved. My child’s flourishing in this environment is a testament to the power of trust, patience, and the willingness to lean into the process. I trust the work we do here, I trust our educators, and most importantly, I’ve learned to trust our learners. 

Resource Roundup

Take a dive into our Competencies and watch our eighth grade learners reflect on their Embark journey using the links below.